11.30.99

Oh, how I breathed the love of September today. Monica has a vacuum in her iris which I get lost in and never want to find my way. Sarah begins to fade though I will not have it. I deliberately passed her incessantly in the halls at lunch with an unknowing Rob. She would not be provoked. I will get the best of her at Prom (for that is a goal!). Meredith was beautiful and swimming and smiling and pernicious and in every way my girl in English today though in the end only hollowness echoed. I feel poetic yet I should mention I purchased a Sega with games and played it in my room. I now feel an academic loss is coming my way, due to the void of T.V. I already felt guilty playing and not reading. Christine and I fought over library fines (friends and money how precariously they mesh) but in the end I paid in mock anger. Later we unconsciously forgot and we love again. I share her with so many that jealousy is impossible. She is all-encompassing. Adam can stimulate my mind while degrading some sense of self-worth. Geoff is all the former and that is why he is my best friend.